A few years ago, I wrote a mildly bad review of a show I’d been to see. I called the show “pretty terrible” but emphasised the fact that, regardless, I had a “fantastic time”. I also pointed out that I thought the show was sexist and homophobic.
A cast member of the show, outraged at my review, took to his keyboard a few days later, like the proud, upstanding warrior (read: neckbeard) he is. He complained that because I was a “bitch dyke” I didn’t understand that the homophobia was in fact funny (soooooo funny!) and that I just needed a “good dicking” in order to lighten up.
Thankfully, this idiot keyboard warrior chose a mutual friend to read and review his comment before submitting it. While he snickered from behind her shoulder, she read in horror, and then promptly told him to fuck off.
The only reason I found out this guy threatened to give me a “good dicking” was because I was intending on going to a party that he was going to be present at, and our mutual friend thought she should warn me.
If he had posted his comment, he would’ve joined thousands of other men (but of course, #notallmen) in hiding behind a keyboard and telling women they deserve to be raped for having a voice.
He would’ve joined a proud community of people who threaten women online and never feel the consequences. The way our laws are enforced hasn’t caught up with society, and so while in the eyes of the law the pen may still maintain its mighty status, and a sword will probably wield some fairly awful damage, apparently a keyboard is about as harmless as a Furby whose batteries ran out in 1998.
Some argue that these keyboard warriors don’t actually intend on following through with their threats – that they’re just lonely neckbeards who ran out of chips – but this is bullshit. When someone threatens to find and rape your mother, as happened to a friend of mine last week, it feels pretty fucking real. That this other friend felt she needed to warn me not to go to that party makes that guy’s intentions pretty clear. And it’s chilling.
But regardless of their intention, these threats are harassment and intimidation. They’re made to routinely remind women that we don’t deserve a voice, that we remain lesser beings in our patriarchal world.
This kind of intimidation happens on a daily basis. Just ask Clementine Ford, who is never afraid to publicly shame those who threaten her. Threats like this happen to, and deeply affect, all women, but in particular marginalised women: queer and trans women, women of colour, women with disabilities, sex workers. When those who have already been pushed to the outskirts of society by oppression are threatened, they are silenced even further, and placed in even more danger.
And when Facebook bans Clementine Ford for publicly shaming those who threaten and intimidate her, as happened in June, we’re told that we should be silenced for speaking out, that we should go back to the kitchen and sit quietly and wait for a man to come and give us a dicking until we shut up.
Well, we’re not shutting up anymore. When friends of mine (and their mothers) were threatened last week, they went to the police with screenshots, over which the police could do very little. This is not enough. Our laws need to be updated and better enforced to reflect the changing ways in which men harm, threaten and oppress women online. Sexual violence won’t be silenced.
This Week…
On Wednesday September 2, Homosocial is back for another round, this time at Freda’s. Featuring all the favourites – Ariane, Cunningpants, Aaron Manhattan, Barbra Blacksheep and Radha La Bia – the night is sure to be full of exce$$.
[Pictured above:Ariane]
Friday September 4 sees the third instalment of the L’Oasis parties at Slyfox,featuring music from L’Oasis, Josh Bentley and Ben Drayton.It’ll be a love-in all night, so bring your stamina.
On Saturday September 5, Swagger is celebrating Beyoncé’s birthday at Arq. Expect a heap of gays getting sweaty to ’90s R&B.
And for the diary, if you’re up for a road trip, Friday September 11 – Sunday September 13 sees the Broken Heel Festival in, you guessed it, Broken Hill. It’ll be a weekend of Priscilla celebrations for the movie’s 21st birthday. She’s all grown up.
[Main image courtesy Flickr:flickr.com/photos/ginnerobot/]
