You ever stop and think how wild it is that we just share our lives with wacky little creatures that we call pets? I have a groodle and every now and then I’m struck by how strange it is that there’s this giant sentient teddy bear just chilling in my house… It’s weird, right?!
Pets are great though. Whichever one of our ancestors decided to invite these little idiots that know nothing but love into our homes (or huts – it was probably huts during that period) deserves prime real estate in the afterlife.
It’s important that we make sure our shared lives with these domesticated dudes is the best that it can be, luckily you don’t need to spend hella stacks to achieve this. Here’s nine items for the discerning pet owner that cost lest than a lobster.
Worm on a string – 
$19.37
$19.37
Worm ? on ? a ? string. These bad boys are hours of fun for any and every cat, hell they could even entertain a simpleton like me for a good few minutes.
This set features a wand to get your precious fingers out of scratching range, it’s advertised as being made of “indestructible carbon fiber” which sounds awesome as hell but I’d take that with a grain of salt. All you need to know is you + worm + string + cat = a great time for all involved (except the worm)!
Floppy fish cat toy
– $12.65
– $12.65
Will your cat enjoy this? Probably. Did I only include this because I find the word “floppy” funny? Yes. Also LOOK AT THAT CAT! I’ve never seen so much excitement in a product shot before.
Pet training clicker
– $13.61
– $13.61
Clickers are an awesome tool for training your pet. If you want your pawed pal to be a super-happy, super-trained super-genius a clicker is a must.
A freakin’ laser pointer!
– $13.99
– $13.99
Cats (and even some dogs) love laser pointers and who can blame them? These things are great! You can give your pet physical exercise and mental enrichment just by flicking your wrist around? Sign me the f**k up!
Please don’t shine them in anyone’s eyes or at vehicles though.
Squeaker balls
– $15.26
– $15.26Ah fetch: the quintessential pastime for the humble canine… These Chuckit! Squeakers are specially designed for smaller pooches with their downsized, chew-resistant design and did I mention they SQUEAK?
If you have a lil babby dog these balls are a must, you can even throw then at your neighbours if they annoy you!*
*The Brag Media does not actually endorse violently pegging balls at people, or anything for that matter.
Penn Plax Aquarium Figurine
– $14.95
– $14.95
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH! Who lives in a pineapple under the sea! Your fish can! Or amphibian, or reptile, or crab, etc!
Pet Hair Remover
– $16.95
– $16.95
I don’t like pet hair… It’s course, rough and irritating… and it gets everywhere! Luckily these nifty little doodads make de-hairing your clothes and furniture a breeze!
Cat Harness and Leash Set
– $19.99
– $19.99
About a year ago I was having breakfast with some friends when a young woman went past walking her cat. Hearing us all swoon over the handsome little guy she came over to introduce him.
“His name’s Weed!” she said in a foreign accent, “Like the drug!”
That woman was cool as hell, and you too can be cool as hell with this cat harness and leash set!
It might seem weird to walk your cat like a dog but think about it this way: you’re giving your pet the exercise and adventures it needs without letting it loose to decimate native wildlife and get hit by a car – it’s a no-brainer!
(If you’re reading this cool girl with the cat named Weed, I hope you’re doing great).
The Holy Bible
– $16.99
– $16.99
Does your pet need Jesus? Get them this bible!
And that’s the list. I hope you found it useful! Give your pet a hug for me! (unless it’s like a fish or something, then hug it in spirit)
