I wanted to take this as an opportunity to say suck shit to all my primary school peers who made fun of me for being poor because I had the ALDI iteration of Mamee Noodles. For over the years ALDI has ascended to the top of the supermarket hierarchy. Their mattresses? I’ve never had a better night sleep. Their workout gear? I’m now carved like a Michelangelo sculpture. Don’t even get me started on their Dutch biscuit selection.
Once in a blue moon, ALDI puts a limited product on the shelves that rattles the nation to its core. One of those products is their el cheapo version of a Thermomix. It’s pretty much a replica of the real deal, bar a couple features and for like 20% of the price.
The eight-in-one machine will bring you one step closer to fulfilling your dream of transforming your kitchen into the safe house from Spy Kids. It features a steamer, rice cooker, blender, grinder, chopper, mincer, mixer, bread maker and an ice crusher.
In this bizarre period of self-isolation where we’ve all transformed into Nicholas Cage in Moonstruck and are baking Foccacia like it’s going out of fashion this is truly the contraption that we all need. It’s Masterchef season baby, and we’re in lockdown. Let’s get this literal bread.
The Thermo Cooker will go on sale at ALDI this Saturday, April 18, and will set you back $299. Please be responsible when it comes to practising social distancing, no fresh bread is worth you getting struck down with COVID-19.
