The U.S. might have great bacon, addictive candy, and extra extra large fast food portions, but it doesn’t sound like bread is all that good over there.
A Reddit post from February last year with the grabby title, “I ate bread in Australia and it ruined my life, has resurfaced online due to Aussies being rather bemused by the bread in question.
The poster gushed over the “most amazing bread” they had while on a trip Down Under. “Now, this bread was the softest, most amazing bread I’ve ever had in my sad American life. The very first bite was ecstasy. I had around three slices before I even thought about popping some in the toaster,” they wrote.
“And the toast was something else. The toast was a godsend. I would pay just to live off of that toast for the rest of my life. It was STILL SOFT despite it being toasted. I remember thinking, ‘Is this the Australian standard? Is this how they live?’”
What could it be? A delicious mixed grain loaf? A beautiful offering from a Melbourne Inner North bakery? When the Redditor then edited their post to reveal they’d discovered the bread in question, his answer was quite underwhelming: it was a Tip Top bread loaf.
It goes without saying that Tip Top is perfectly fine – my house generally has a loaf of it lying around at some point during the week – but “ecstasy”? That seems a bit far, mate.
After someone shared the Reddit post on Twitter this week, describing it as “the saddest thing I’ve ever read in my entire life,” Aussies reacted incredulously to the post.
“Just wait until you try Australian coffee,” noted one user. “They tried bottom of the shelf Aussie bread and are already addicted, how bad is American bread???” asked another.
What a strange story. So next time you find yourself having a slice of Tip Top, make sure to appreciate every morsel – there’s a jealous, hungry American somewhere wishing they were you.
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Jesus Christ, they tried bottom of the shelf Aussie bread and are already addicted, how bad is American bread??? https://t.co/WydfovjxEx
— s e t h (@peggles_V8SC) October 28, 2021
Just wait until you try Australian coffee. https://t.co/vqwvaEs04i
— Silver Sheep (@silversheepbaa) October 27, 2021
Nothing has fucked me up more than learning Americans put sugar into their bread. That's cake, my friends. That's cake.
— Kara Schlegl (@karaschlegl) October 27, 2021
Bread in USA is weird and gross. It's pretty much impossible to find bread at the big supermarkets that isn't kind of sweet, and you can forget about sourdough!
Even the dinner rolls at restaurants are an unpleasantly sweet experience 😩 https://t.co/mBBpZdMEyP
— reroy (@okreroy) October 28, 2021