Calling Australia’s current nanny state approach to illicit drugs an “unmitigated disaster”, the Greens leader Richard Di Natale has unleashed the party’s plans to “tightly regulate” the legal use of recreational marijuana – a move he explains would generate hundreds of millions of dollars in tax revenue.

“Governments around the world are realising that prohibition of cannabis causes more harm than it prevents,” Senator Di Natale said.

“It’s time Australia joined them and legalised cannabis for adult use.”

It’s a common sense approach that has been adopted in many countries around the world, as well as in numerous U.S. states.

“[The legal issues] drive people away from getting help when they need it and exposes them to a dangerous black market”, he continued.

“The Greens see drug use as a health issue, not a criminal issue.”

It obviously wouldn’t be a free for all. Those under 18 wouldn’t be able to purchase weed, and the Government would control the wholesale supply to stores, as well as the issuing of such sale licences. “Responsible sale of cannabis” training will be mandatory for dispensaries, and health warnings and strain information would be on the plain packaging.

Advertising would be banned (although, as we well know, this stuff sells itself) and the tax excise will go towards drug treatment and educational programs – among other community-minded projects.

In related news, the sales of Cheetos would also skyrocket, as well as the viewer figures for old episodes of Futurama. The future is coming!