Week seven of lockdown. I thought I had maxed out on feeling deranged and schizophrenic, but this country has a way of really pushing your mental health to its limits. From the rising coronavirus cases to the damning IPCC report, what will be thrown our way next? Young Liberals raising money by raffling off lumps of coal from the Adani mine, apparently.

On Saturday night, the ACT Young Liberals held a ‘Midwinter Ball’ fundraising event at the Hotel Realm. Tickets for the Scrooge-like soirée started at $160 for members, with other tiers ranging from silver, $200, to platinum, $600.

The crowning moment of the evening was no doubt the sale of a lump of coal from the Carmichael Bravis mine (formerly known as Adani). The coal, which was first produced back in June, reportedly sold for $2,600, to an unnamed attendee with all proceeds going to the ACT Young Liberals. It is not clear who donated the coal for the auction.

It’s a spit in the face of the warning issued by the world’s climate scientists.

“In the same week the IPCC report came out, an attendee at the ACT Young Liberals’ Midwinter Ball on Saturday paid $2,600 during the fundraiser for a literal lump of coal from the Adani mine,” ACT minister for energy and emissions reduction, Shane Rattenbury told the Canberra Times. “I can’t tell which I find more insulting – the fact that the organisers thought this was a good idea or the purchaser who paid an average person’s fortnightly income for it.”

“Either way, it is openly mocking the climate crisis that Australia and the world faces. I’d like to see the Canberra Liberal members in attendance to disavow this behaviour, and agree that climate change, burning fossil fuels and the Adani mine are matters to take seriously, not to laugh at.”

I lack the energy and stamina to scramble for a hot take about these depressing scenes. Make of it what you will. The world feels like it’s teetering on the brink of collapse, briefcase wankers are spending their dosh on coal. I’ve decided to tap out, complete disassociation. I’m looking at all the figures being thrown around the ring and I’m feeling more at peace with spending $1000 on a pair of Tabi’s.

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Listen to ‘Joel The Lump Of Coal’ by The Killers