Big Dick Energy is the thing we all needed in 2018. I read a tweet the other day that said “America needs to get laid”, and ain’t that the truth? It’s not just the USA though. We are all opposing forces, miserably serious, focused on calling out each other for niggling imperfections.

Paul Rust Get Laid Tweet

Chris Rock summed up this building tension perfectly for me in his standup set about relationships and how to make them last.

Yeah, you wanna stay together. How do you stay together? You gotta fuck. It’s that simple. You gots to fuck. People are like, “When we got together, it was so much fun, but then problems arose.” No they didn’t. Nothing arose. Every problem you have today, you had when you met. But you were fucking so you forgave.

A quick 101 for anyone who is not au fait with Big Dick Energy (BDE). The Cut described as physically affecting, “a certain gait”. The conception of this explosive idea came from a tweet from Ariana Grande earlier this week.

Ariana Grande 10 inches tweet

The pop singer lovingly revealed that her finance Pete Davidson was packing heat – like ten inches of it, to be exact – and the internet has turned, suddenly understanding the explosion of love between the two. Pete Davidson’s dick, and the energy, vibe, swagger it gives him has now been discussed at great length.

The BDE is a seal of chill masculinity – a laidback and calm swagger that comes from knowing you got that; you need to go to no great lengths to show your great lengths. It’s an aura, a vibe, physical in its roots, spiritual in its external effect. Big Dick Energy is all about deportment: it’s positive, masculine, chill and super duper sexy.

Let’s go deeper.

The Cut goes on to talk about the difference between being “up for fucking” and BDE:

[BDE is ] a healthy, satisfied, low-key way you feel yourself. Some may call this “oh he/she fucks” vibe, but that is different: you can fuck, but not have BDE.

Some things are ancient – like our primal urges, survival, anxiety, the urge to hunt and sleep and mate, and our complicated relationship with big dicks. Men want them, women want to be around them, and we all feel guilty about being secretly obsessed with them.

For example, psychiatrists are obsessed by cocks. Lucien Freud coined the idea of the Oedipus complex, drawn from penis envy (the controversial and I guess diametrical oppositional force of BDE) which is all about penis envy. He introduced this concept in his 1899 book ‘Interpretation of Dreams.’

Famed psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung talks in his autobiography of his “first dream” which he believed to have shaped his whole life, work, spirituality and career – where he crawls underground to meet a giant phallus dressed in a priest robe (everything is allowed in dreams) and goes on to isolate the Big Dick and the most primal and powerful element of the world.

“At all events, the phallus of this dream seems to be a subterranean God “not to be named,” and such it remained throughout my youth, reappearing whenever anyone spoke too emphatically about Lord Jesus.”

As The Verge noted, “Once you’ve read the words, they stick with you, almost demanding to be spoken out loud.” That’s BDE, it’s life changing.

Our yin and yangs, our differences, rather than being something we can grind up against and fetishise have become our chastity belts. What we really needed in 2018 was a viral hot take that wasn’t about how wrong everything is. What we needed was a lollypop-sucking, candy-coated, lube-using piece of content that reminds us all of dicks, and sex, and lust, and love. Just for a ten inch moment.