Denmark launches new kid’s TV show about man with a giant magical schlong

There are some great shows for children out there and then there’s this new Danish kid’s show about a man with a stupidly giant penis.

Ah, I remember the days when children’s shows were things like Lizzie McGuire, stuff on Nickelodeon, and whatever was on Cartoon Network.

So I’m a little baffled at what exactly happened in the world of wholesome, entertaining kid’s TV from when I was a kid to the current generation of children because Denmark thought it was a good idea to make a kid’s show about a man with a giant penis that’s somehow magical.

As per The Guardian, this new Danish animated kid’s show is titled John Dillermand (which literally means John “penis-man” in Danish slanh) and revolves around the titular character and his comedic daily struggles with living a penis that resembles a garden hose than human anatomy.

But more extraordinary – or bizarre depending on your mileage – than the fact that Johnny’s Johnny is longer than a literal python is how it is able to things regular humans would struggle with, like cooking BBQ (ouch), performing rescuing operations, making murals, and even stealing ice cream from children.

Yes, there is indeed something unsettling about a man using his giant penis to steal ice cream from children.

Anyway, to the absolute surprise of no one, this new show has drawn the ire of parents across Denmark and started a discussion on what “good” content children’s TV should and shouldn’t contain.

In response to the outcry, DR, the broadcaster that produced John Penis-man Dillermand, stated it could’ve just as easily made a kid’s show about a “woman with no control over her vagina” and that the most important thing is that children enjoy this show about the man with the giant magical penis.

After all the rejoicing over the cancellation of Caillou, it seems like parents everywhere have a new show to target and scream “think of the children!” at.

Check out the intro to this Danish kid’s TV show about the man with a giant magical penis (aka John Dillermand):

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