The last time the Oscars had a host feels like a distant memory now. It came in 2018 when late night host Jimmy Kimmel hosted for the second year in a row. Nothing could top his first time hosting when THAT Moonlight and La La Land mixup went down in infamy. Kimmel in 2018 was fine – Jimmy Kimmel doing anything is the definition of “fine”. 

But the last three host-less years were much worse. All were utterly forgettable ceremonies, containing no excitement or hilarity. Even the haphazard pairing of James Franco and Anne Hathaway would have been welcome in the place of nobody.

Thankfully, though, the 2022 Oscars are putting an end to the wilderness years. As reported by The Hollywood Reporter, the ceremony on March 27th will have one host.

Who should it be? When the news broke, people had lots of suggestions – some genuine, most comical. We also had a few potentially great hosts in mind. Take a look below at our four “very serious” contenders to be this year’s Oscar hosts and then see who everyone else suggested on social media.

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Frances McDormand

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It’s tradition for the winner of Best Actress to return to present the same award the following year. McDormand won last time out for her emotional performance in Nomadland but the Academy Awards should go one step further and get her to host the whole thing. Famously curmudgeonly and not one to take any bullshit, McDormand would have the Hollywood phonies on strings.

Your speech runs too long? Yes, that’s Frances McDormand tutting loudly behind you. She doesn’t agree with your triumph in one of the categories? Yes, that’s Frances McDormand trying to wrestle the Oscar statue from your hands. She also is in the running for another Best Actress nomination for her role in The Tragedy of Macbeth, and it would be fun to watch a host go wild at winning an award themselves.

The Front Man from Squid Game

Awards ceremonies should be serious occasions, didn’t you know? There’s no time for lame Billy Crystal jokes or atrocious Neil Patrick Harris set pieces. Hollywood needs strict discipline, people. That’s where Squid Game‘s The Front Man comes in.

He literally rules with an iron fist. The elusive overseer of the survival competition only knows untold brutality so celebrities crying over winning Best Adapted Screenplay won’t faze him one bit. South Korea had the best Best Picture winner of recent times in Parasite, so it seems a natural extension to give them hosting duties as well.

The Wiggles

The reason for this one is simple: unless Ellen released a banger I don’t know about, no Oscar host will also have had the chance to win triple j’s Hottest 100 in the same year. What a double honour that would be. The beloved Aussie group are currently favourites to triumph for their cover of Tame Impala’s ‘Elephant’. Just imagine the wonderful sight of the colourful six-piece gloating in front of an audience of bemused American glitterati.

Zooey Deschanel

Twee is back! As Gen Z eagerly hoovers up all manners of Y2K trends, the humble twee is the latest to re-examined. The Queen of Twee herself, Zooey Deschanel, addressed it in a new TikTok this week. She’d make an excellent topical host. Let her just saunter onstage in her denim dungarees. Let her play her mandolin between every category. Let her make strange noises that humans generally don’t make to emphasise shock or surprise. If nothing else, it might bring a boost to viewing figures thanks to new Get Z fans of the New Girl star.

@zooeydeschanel

I’d like to thank TikTok for teaching me what twee means

♬ Why Do You Let Me Stay Here? – She & Him

Pete Davidson and Kanye West

The Oscars used to not mind a double host. Bob Hope and Thelma Ritter. Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin. James Franco and Anne Hathaway. The results aren’t always excellent but they’re invariably interesting.

Step forward Pete Davidson and Kanye West. The pair are currently involved in one of the strangest celebrity love triangles ever (or is it a foursome with Julia Fox now?). Ye buys a house directly opposite his wife while she goes to movie theatres in Staten Island with Davidson. The Saturday Night Live comedian wears Kim K’s SKIMS alongside Flavor Flav while Ye talks about heading to Russia to meet up with Vladimir Putin. It’s like mad libs gone wild.

Yet there doesn’t seem to be any genuine bad blood between the pair – they used to be friends after all. If the Oscars want to bring in their biggest ratings of all time – after a recent notable slump – this is how they do it. Ye interrupting winner’s speeches to declare his love for Kim while Davidson sniggers and vapes in the background. A visibly stoned Davidson forgetting every presenter’s name while Ye tries to cut to a Yeezy Gap commercial. Absolute carnage.

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