★☆
If a film could be held up by Kate Beckinsale in black leather, and an unapologetic case of hipster balayage, then Underworld: Blood Wars would have had a fighting chance.
Unfortunately, most filmgoers these days have a thirst for decent plots, well executed fight scenes and un-clunky dialogue. Bless, Blood Wars is so low on any meaty components, we’re all at risk of becoming anaemic.
Blood Wars picks up where its predecessor, 2012’s Awakening, dropped off. There’s the usual tension between Lycans and vampires (humans, sod ’em, have finally buggered off elsewhere and the real beast of a tiff can run its course). Yet as movie franchises go, it seems Underworld has started to hound us.
There is of course a new Lycan leader, Marius, as Beckinsale’s Selene is far too effective a death-dealer to leave the same hairy abomination lolloping around at the end of each film. Our designated eye candy here, however, is David (Theo James), the troubled but noble vampire. His haunted countenance provides some interest, but he’s quickly bogged down in the saturation of subplots and high school English exchanges.
Still, action-fantasy audiences are usually willing to forgive strained and jilting dialogue in service of fight scenes, an impressive soundtrack and incredible visuals. For a film that has the phrase ‘blood wars’ in its title, however, the action scenes are too few, clunky and leave an aftertaste of awkward choreography. The soundtrack is mediocre at best, and the graphics, while gripping, are not in the league of Underworld’s contemporaries.
Blood Wars’ narrative journey is tangled in too many sublots to maintain much sense, suspense or satisfaction. It is near impossible to attain substantial closure for any of the ridiculous twists. The film ends upon a wide-open note of possibility, which means there are definitely more instalments to come.
We can only hope it’ll be a case of better luck next time.
Underworld: Blood Wars is in cinemas now.
