Every day we loom closer to singularity, and I, for one, am ready to embrace it. Woolworths are rolling out their brand new Scan&Go system — which allows shoppers to use their smartphone to scan and pay for groceries through an app. Woolworths reckon this will give customers the freedom to skip queues and get home faster, but we reckon they’re single-handedly trying to make human interaction a thing ff the past.

To celebrate the new system, Woolworths is offering a 25 per cent discount off your grocery bill until the end of September. The offer is available in six stores across Sydney — where the technology is undergoing System. Thankfully the working-class population of Double Bay and Mona Vale will be eligible for the 25% discount that will really tide them over until payday. Other participating locations include the Metro stores on Pitt Street, George Street, York Street and Metcentre in the city.

If you can be bothered to haul yourself to one of these locations, we implore you to take it as an opportunity to treat yourself to the umpteenth degree. I personally will be stockpiling on that bougie as hell Mayver’s peanut butter, sorry Kraft, your days are numbered, bitch.

Or y’know, stock up on those essentials that always seem to leave a hefty hole in your wallet, like shaving paraphernalia, or cleaning products. Or buy whatever you god damn well please, don’t let a stranger on the internet dictate how you use your discount.

The 25 per cent discount will be available for purchases of up to $1,000.

Unfortunately, if you were looking to chomp down a piping hot serving of Winfield Optimum Crush Blues for a discounted price, that dream will never be a reality. The discount doesn’t apply to tobacco products, alcohol or gift cards.

For more information head here.

Get unlimited access to the coverage that shapes our culture.
to Rolling Stone magazine
to Rolling Stone magazine